I never want to forget

Please note: this writing to is for my personal documentation of a foundational conversation and truth blast that is pivotal in our lives for the Glory of God. Please read with this in mind and know that I am not writing for an audience of blog readers. But still I choose to keep my blog public because I love people and believe God speaks to us in mysterious and unforseen ways and life experiences of others.

I never want to forget...the realization that I had to explain to my 5 year old..I cannot keep it from her anymore. As scary as it is. It is reality. It isn't discussed because it isn't understood by the world. It's all written and explained in one book yet more than just any book. The living holy word of God and even those words are not going to be believed and accepted by many. I realize this hard heart wrenching truth. Even now as I write this my eyes are full of tears because this world is a battle ground.
Where countries are consumed by selfish deceit of hopes of authority, wealth and prosperity.
Where men are being lied to and cheated out of their identity as God created them for. Where women are pressured to one up career status quo.
Where women make their homes and nurture their children in the worlds disrespect and with daily gruelsome toil that more often than not raw tired emotion, lonliness, and tiny tot mundane tasks are more than they can bear.
Marriages crumble. Children ache and simply survive with confusion and much unknown.
Sin encroaches...There is no one righteous, not even one; there is not one who understands, not one who seeks God. (Romans 3:11)

But the battle belongs to the Lord!

So read on...
Now a righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. (Romans 3:21-26)

My 5 year old and my 3 year old know these two realities written in red above , but what I had to explain...what I couldn't keep from her any longer after a direct question from my daughter, "Mom, Satan is dead, right?"

I had to tell her truth. Sugar coating won't make it better, because her earthly life is only going to get harder, temptation and trials and sin and the presence of evil will come as the day grows near. The battle is getting stronger because time is running out...

I never want to forget...or want my family to forget that:
Satan is alive but we need not be afraid. Follow this truth:

Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy, the devil (aka Satan) prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. to him be power for ever and ever. Amen. (1 Peter 5:8)
So, we talked about the good versus evil; God, creator and ruler or heaven and earth and Satan, prince of this world (earth). That Satan is alive. And Satan's purpose is to detour humans from the love of Jesus Christ and the greatest display of power ever to be known to man (The resurrection from death on a cross.) Even Satan knows the truth and who wins. Therefore, we should hold fast to Jesus. "Jesus is in my heart, mom." Miracle said. "Yes, and just always remember that and who won the battle?"

Jesus said, "Do not be afraid. I am the first and the last. I am the Living One: I was dead, and behold I am alive for ever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and Hades." (Revelation 1:17-18)

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And so it is no surprise to me as I reflect upon my week that I can see the prowling lion seeking us. I have let my womanly hormones and emotions overtake at times. I walked away from bible study discouraged and alone. Tempted to stop trying to make friends in this new place. The trip to the library was stressful and defeating. The mom role was wearisome. My husbands work was longer and more grueling than most weeks leading to disconnect in marriage.
Yet, in it all through the power of Jesus in my family, a testimony and glimpse of victory was shared with people all over the country through a letter, a girl was encouraged about a daily Jesus time over coffee, neighbors were lifted up in prayer, co-workers were prayed for, protection and healing were captured through the power of prayer, and my daughter is singing louder and bolder than ever the name of JESUS because she knows the truth. I opened the ipad only to find that my husband was working on making a detailed prayer list for each day of the week. i was humbled after frustration with him. And I am brought back to the heartbeat of what I was created for...the daily mundane is more than what I see, it is a battle field and we should live in VICTORY for all to see whether they understand, have eyes to see, or ears to hear...Satan has always been alive but Jesus was alive, was dead, and is alive forevermore. So I will not stop. I never want to forget that this earthly life is more...it is a battle and though Satan is alive and appearing to win...Jesus won the victory!
Our eyes are fixed upon it.
Amen.

Breathing Through Some Fears

Breathing Shallow
We named them all just one name because it's always just one at a time. His name is Larry. Larry the spider. This lil' creature is the reason for Miracle's fear and the reason she won't sit in the chair nearest the wall at the dinner table. So every once in awhile Larry crawls up the wall to join us for dinner and his life comes quickly to an end but Miracle is still afraid. And Matthias talks to him and quickly runs to get the kleenix... but naming the spider has created a brief moment for a pet but no longer than that.

Breathing Deep
I hold him tight and stroke his back through the fleece footie pajamas and I sing. And suddenly he sings too. He isn't afraid to jabber his way through the songs. His 16 1/2 month old 'talking' warms my heart as we sing Jesus Loves You together and he sings, "ba ba" for bible. His little arms span across my body and his fingers grasp tightly around my shoulders, with his head resting gently upon my shoulders he knows the singing is over and the momma is praying and soon the crib will be his comfort. He doesn't want to stop singing. He says, "mo" which translates into more songs at bedtime. Oh the comfort of his small cuddly body and the willingness to stay with me and listen to me sing and pray over him. There is nothing not to cherish about it. And I ponder. As I hold him in the dark with a tighter squeeze myself. I whisper how much I love him. Do I cling to my Heavenly Father like this. Do I strive to get my hands around Him and hold tight. Is my head resting peacefully upon His shoulder? Am I listening? Can I hear Him singing over me and do I start to sing with Him even though I know He is singing to me.
I am afraid ... that truth be told, I am struggling to be God's child in this beautful cherishable daily moment. I want to rest. I want to be held. I want to hear Him singing and for my heart to sing along with Him.

Breathing Deep Once More
"Mommy! I'm scared. mommy, please come here." she yells from her bed. I just tucked her in. I go back in to talk with her and she is afraid. Scared of fires. She asks lots of questions about how fires start and I answer them the best I can on a 5 year old level. I pray over her and her heart and mind and say amen. She says with such convincing drama, "I just can't get the thoughts of fire out of my head." So we talk about our bible verse, "when I am afraid, I will trust in you" and I put the song on repeat. It was a perfect moment to teach her about taking our thoughts captive unto Christ. I explained to her that every time she thinks about the fires or other thoughts she doesn't want to have to give the thought to Jesus. she said, "ok but it just comes back." Next, I told her that we have to replace the thought with a bible verse. I asked her if she knew a bible verse she could say. "Yes, I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." So every time you have a scary thought then quickly tell Jesus to take the thought and say your bible verse out loud. We practiced a few times. She asks me to pray once more...and I pray with a thinkful heart that all I need to parent is written in the bible. Amen.