Friday, October 4, 2013

A letter for my friends

To each women that God brings into my life, 

I want you to know that I am so delighted and excited to know you. I want to know your story. I want to see the heartbeat of God in your life, I want to talk to you with so much deep down ecstatic joy that you will wonder if I had too much caffeine. I want to laugh and be loud, to cry and go deep, to pray and walk with you as you work out your salvation. I want to be with you wherever it is that you breathe in Jesus for the first time. I want to run through the muck with you knowing that it is temporary. I want to talk until we run out if words. And I want to love Jesus so much you think I have lost it. Call me crazy and I will tell you it's true love that captivated me; not a slave to sin but a servant freed! My chains are gone and I can't contain myself. 

This is not good

It was good. 
It was very good. 
That is what God said in the garden about us, his creation, bearing his earthly image. But my heart and mind can't always say it is good. 
This will happen. Jesus promised that trial, tragedy, war, and hardship would come. He says to not be frightened. I want to be strong but the obvious is the natural pull. To be afraid...afraid that the world will swallow and steal and destroy so much. So what do I do when life is consuming? When the world screams to grasp anything but truth. When all I want is to be approved of God but find myself trying to get approval from men.  The comparison trap becomes my measuring stick and it keeps slapping me towards legalism and failure or at least enough confusion and frustration that I want to give up. 
I claim whose I am. I am not my own. I was chosen. I am beloved. I am on the potters wheel still. I am a work in progress and the creator God almighty continues to put breath into my body and wake me up each day. 
In this world of information overload, the opinions and ideas multiply by the seconds. The deceiver is scheming to trap us. I find myself ensnared. From nutrition to parenting to education to spirituality; I jump from blog to blog, from peer conversations to intentional change hoping that I will gain. But I notice that life isn't getting back to good and Gods words are reigning true supremacy. It has to happen. The path is narrow and the workers are few. I cannot afford to be horizontally distracted when the very core of my entire being is connected directly with heaven. And I know I am not home yet. I yearn for the day when the fight to rest on The Lord instead of my independence ceases. I yearn for the day when I can stop casting my anxieties and cares on the Lord because there will be no more. I yearn for the day when perfection will shine brighter than the sun and worship will be all I know. I well up with tears knowing that my bridegroom is coming back for me. Yet I burn with a passion deep inside knowing that deception is constantly around us, a passion that shouts, "cling to the truth and let yourself be vertically embraced by the one and only Jesus Christ who saves you and crushes the enemy once and forever. You and I do not have to be consumed or pulled down. For you ohLord  God are so much more than good you are great and your love endures forever. You faithfulness to me In my faithless times cannot be stopped. Your protection and guidance is my plea in a world wandering so far from good and evil seems to prevail. You Lord Jesus  have my heart and will keep my feet fitted to stand firm until the trumpet sounds and the clouds divide. I cannot imagine. Oh keep me watching and waiting and all the while serving you as my audience of one.